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Author Topic: Hmm...Anyone know some good jokes?  (Read 15654 times)
Jafar
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« on: September 04, 2004, 08:30:42 AM »

YOU CAN TUNE A PIANO BUT YOU CAN'T TUNA FISH! Cheesy

.........Tough crowd.
Why didn't the tomato win the race?
He just couldn't ketchup! laugh
.......Don't make me break my promise. <_<  
« Last Edit: September 04, 2004, 08:51:02 AM by Jafar » Logged


Jarada Knight: The Honorable Marshmallow
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« Reply #1 on: September 04, 2004, 10:35:16 AM »

What's a mime's favourite punchline? "".
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Jafar
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« Reply #2 on: September 04, 2004, 02:18:58 PM »

Alright, you've forced me into this.
Whats the difference between a duck?
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Jarada Knight: The Honorable Marshmallow
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« Reply #3 on: September 04, 2004, 02:30:55 PM »

Somebody lock Jafar up and throw away the key please! :angry:  
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Jafar
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« Reply #4 on: September 04, 2004, 02:34:33 PM »

Er...Gatta run! *flies away*
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Jarada Knight: The Honorable Marshmallow
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« Reply #5 on: September 04, 2004, 02:45:24 PM »

Quack quack...
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Jafar
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« Reply #6 on: September 04, 2004, 03:24:54 PM »

OC, weren't you able to summon bizzare duck suits?
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Jarada Knight: The Honorable Marshmallow
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« Reply #7 on: September 04, 2004, 05:39:07 PM »

Yes, but I gave that up. No more duck suits for me, nosiree.
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Jafar
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« Reply #8 on: September 04, 2004, 10:36:30 PM »

Why did the chicken cross the road?
I dunno, why don't you ask that fox that just went into the chicken coop.
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« Reply #9 on: September 04, 2004, 10:55:12 PM »

Oh i got one, it isnt funny tho.

Why did the turkey cross the road?
Because the chicken left for a vacation in florida.

sorry, i am not in one of those hyper-jokey moods.
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« Reply #10 on: September 05, 2004, 06:02:51 PM »

There once was a peasant who had two chickens; but on a fateful day one of them fell ill. So he killed the other to make chicken soup for the sick bird.
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« Reply #11 on: September 06, 2004, 05:58:09 AM »


One of the legs are both the same!
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Jarada Knight: The Honorable Marshmallow
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« Reply #12 on: September 06, 2004, 09:01:24 AM »

I seriously don't get that joke.

*polymorphs Jafar for telling that joke countless number of times*

*Jafar is now a rat*
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Glorioushero324
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« Reply #13 on: September 06, 2004, 03:20:40 PM »

OH...OH.. i found a funny one.

Blonde Joke
A Blonde Goes On Who Wants To Be A Millionaire
Regis: "Barbara, you've done very well so far - $500,000 and one lifeline left -- phone a friend.

The next question will give you the top prize of One Million dollars if you get it right ... but if you get it wrong you will drop back to $32,000 -- are you ready?"

Barbara: "Sure, I'll have a go!"

Regis: "Which of the following birds does not build it's own nest?

Is it........

A-Robin

B-Sparrow

C-Cuckoo

D-Thrush

Remember Barbara its worth 1 Million dollars."

"I think I know who it..but I'm not 100%...

No, I haven't got a clue. I'd like to phone a friend Regis, just to be sure.

Regis: "Yes, who, Barbara, do you want to phone?

Barbara: "I'll phone my friend Maggie back home in Birmingham."

(ringing)

Maggie (also a blonde): "Hello..."

Regis: "Hello Maggie, its Regis here from Who Wants to be a Millionaire-I have Barbara here and she is doing really well on $500,000, but needs your help to be a Million.

The next voice you hear will be Barbara's and she'll read you the question.

There are 4 possible answers and 1 correct answer and you have 30 seconds to answer -- fire away Barbara."

Barbara: "Maggie, which of the following birds does not build it's own nest? Is it:

A-Robin

B-Sparrow

C-Cuckoo

D-Thrush"

Maggie: "Oh Gees, Barbara that's simple.....It's a Cuckoo."

Barbara: "You think?"

Maggie: "I'm sure."

Barbara: " Thanks Maggie." (hangs up)

Regis: "Well, do you want to stick on $500,000 or play on for the Million, Barbara?"

Barbara: "I want to play, I'll go with C-Cuckoo"

Regis: "Is that your final answer?"

Barbara: "It is."

Regis: "Are you confident?"

Barbara: "Yes fairly, Maggie's a sound bet."

Regis: "Barbara.....you had $500,000 and you said C-Cuckoo ...you're right! - You have just won ONE MILLION DOLLARS.

Here is your check. You have been a great contestant and a real gambler. Audience please put your hands together for Barbara."

(clapping)

That night Barbara calls round to Maggie and brings her down to a local bar for a celebration drink and, as they are sipping their Champagne, Barbara turns to Maggie and asks "Tell me Maggie, How in God's name did you know that it was the Cuckoo that does not build its own nest?

Maggie: "Listen Barbara, everybody knows that a Cuckoo lives in a clock."
 
 
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« Reply #14 on: September 06, 2004, 03:45:51 PM »

That's a pretty long Blonde joke.
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